Music: The Cool Kids
As most of you know (do you? have I mentioned this before?), I am staying with Natalie’s mother and step father in Brisbane. They are a wonderful pair, and have been together for 9 years this March 16th. They are also getting married March 16th! This March 16th! Monday! I’m going! To a wedding!
Yay! I have mixed feelings about weddings, which I won’t get into at the moment, but one reason I am pleasantly pleased about this one, is that they are calling it a Commitment Ceremony, which just about brought tears to my eyes. Also, Lachlan (Sharon’s second child from her first marriage) is walking Sharon down the isle. Tear!!
Anyways, when I first moved here, preparations for the big day were under way. Unfortunately, Sharon came home one day dissapointed. Her dress was not as she wanted it.
Leah and I both “commoned” and “it’s probably gorgeous’d” untill she put the dress on for us.
“Coommmooon, it’s … it’s … it’s nice!”
“Yah! I mean, with some jewelery and … you’re wearing lots of jewelery right?”
“And hair, and makeup and some nice shoes….”
This was quickly going downhill.
I’m not one for bullshitting, I tell the truth and say what I think if you ask my opinion (opinion askers beware!!!). I stopped myself and thought for a moment, cause I learnt that after a few foot-in-mouth incidents. I went in carefully…
“Is this what you asked for?”
“No.”
“Did you ask her to fix it.”
“She won’t. She said that this is how it’s going to be.”
Alright, I see we have a case of the “I’m too afraid to put my foot down and tell someone exactly what I want, even if it’s my wedding dress and MY wedding”. Memories of Nat in China having a bad hairstylist experience comes back to me and I realize the lack of putting ones foot down runs in the family.
“Well, it’s really a nice dress…. But these things here… and the lack of anything here… and…” I offer constructive critcism.
I inform them that for co-op in high school, I worked at a Bridal shop, putting finishing touches (like beading and lace and sequins) on wedding dresses and could add something to this dress to spice it up. (If you are wondering why the co-op job, it’s because I used to want to be a fashion designer… untill I realized how much of my life would then have to be dedicated to sewing…).
Anyways, I took the task on, Sharon and I went to their local craft and houseware department store and bought enough beads and sequins to … well.. to bead a wedding dress. For the last week, before work and after work I have been slaving away at this damn dress.
At first I was excited about it, I started googling wedding dress images to inspire me, started secretly designing my own future wedding dress (not that i’ll ever get married and therefore won’t ever get a wedding dress… but Vera Wang… if you’re ever giving away anything for free…) and had fun beading while bawling my eyes out to the movie Love Actually (which I’ve seen/cried to 100 times).
I’m over the fun now… my eyes are sick of squinting at these tiny beads, my fingers are sick of getting poked with pins, I also have my moms habit of putting extra pins in my mouth, so my tongue and lips are also sick of the poking. My back is aching from constantly crouching over this thing, and I’m tired of untangling the stupid invisible thread!!!
But I must finish! It is Thursday, and the wedding is Monday, and I work everyday until then and Natalie is coming home, and I think Sharon is secretly stressing that it isn’t done yet. No worries! My moto: Go Big, or Go Home… the dress WILL get done and it will be gorgeous!
So, last night I’m beading away and I start watching talks on Ted Talks and I come across this one: http://www.ted.com/index.php/talks/mena_trott_tours_her_blog_world.html
She talks about blogging and I’ll let you check it out yourself, but basically, she speaks about the importance of blogs. Sure there are the political blogs, the news blogs, the people doing kind things blogs and the gossip blogs… but what about the regular, everyday life of everyday normal people blogs (coughcough… 
)? Are they boring? Are they narcissistic?
NO! They are wonderful! This talk by Mena Trott made me look at blogging in a different light. Imagine everyone could blog?! Imagine everyone had one?! Every one of your friends and family members? Wouldn’t it be great for a person like me, to go to their grandfathers blog and see what he was doing or what he looked like back in 1945 or something?! My mother’s father passed away of alzeihmers when I was about nine years old… Imagine if I could just go on the internet and learn about him (cause I can’t really get to know him now…) any day, any time! My father’s mother, my Nanny, one of my favourite people in the whole world, also has alzheimers… I have great memories of her and of our time together… but it would be amazing to have a whole diary of her life that I can just click a few buttons to get to when I am missing her.
I used to think blogs were cheesy… the only reason I got one, was because it was my first time moving far far away from home and all my friends and family, and i wanted them to have an easy way see what I was up too, without having to email 100s of people every week (yes, I have 100s of friends… 
). I’m glad I see blogs differently now and I hope you do to after reading this, and checking out the link. Do your kids, grandchildren and great grandchildren a favour and start a blog today .
Blogs are a great idea! It has enabled me to see and invision what one of my pride and joys in life, my lovely daughter, has been up to while on her great adventure on the other side of the planet. It has been wonderful as I check in numerous times every day to see what my world traveler is up to, what she is seeing and learning as well as how she is brightening up the world by sharing of herself. I should actually start a blog myself some day soon. Perhaps she would take the time to read my blog and get to know me better as not only her parent but, a man working his way through life, enjoying the good tmes and struggling through rough times just like her.
Once upon a time, not so long ago, children and grandchildren use to actually sit down and talk with their parents and grandparents around the dinner table or simply in the living room over a pot of coffee or a cold drink. Family reunions were common place. Children and grandchildren would take the time to ask questions or listen to adults share stories of good times, bad times, glory days and the like. Many a lesson was learned. Lots of laughs created great memories and sometimes many a tear was shed listening to stories of war and struggles or of times when our fathers were hopping the trains to look for work in places far from family and home. There was always adult time and children time but, mixed in there was a healthy blend (of course sometimes not so healthy. But that’s another story) of family time. That is where brothers, sisters, cousins, aunts, uncles and grandparents got to actually know one another and helped each other to learn, grow and mature. I am one of the fortunate ones. Although my grandparents are no longer with us, I still have memories of their stories and family reunions and lessons learned. I am still close to my dad, my brothers, my cousins and aunts and uncles as well. We still laugh about times spent together having fun and our arguments with one another. Last summer my dad actually rode the train across Canada reliving old memories while on his way to visit with my brother’s family and myself here in Vancouver. Dad and I sat up for hours while he shared old stories of his youth and his adventures that I will not only cherish but, one day get to share with my children and grandchildren. At times we all drift apart for a while but, when we do see each other we pick up right where we left off and carry on sharing stories of times gone by and present day joys and challanges.
Now it appears as though us parents and our children have so many things taking up our time and getting in the way of getting to know and truely understand and appreciate one another as the individuels that we are. Families have been falling apart over the last 20 years or so like never before. That quality “family time” is now a thing of the past. Parents are busy trying to make ends meet while attempting to have a life. Children are enjoying their life while finding other things to do with their time other than getting to know their elders when the opportunity presents itself.
The new generation (x and y) don’t have time to do such things. As a Realtor here in Vancouver I am experiencing the younger generation in a completely different way than I do my generation. My generation will actually pick up the phone and call me when seriously inquiring about real estate. Or, they will email me with a phone number that I can reach them at when they or I am available and we will actually talk and get to know each other and see if I may be of service. The younger generation hide behind emails waiting for a number of Realtors to get them what they need and want NOW. A Realtor/client relationship isn’t something they are familiar with. They feel they can get everythig they need from the internet. WRONG! Nothing will ever replace working towards a common goal together, one on one, with a Realtor you can trust.
No doubt your children and your childrens’ children will have blogs to look back on but, right now, for the most part, when it comes to my parents’ past and your parents’ past, nothing replaces belly to belly , face to face or next case senario, phone to phone or skype to skype.
When you come back to the motherland Lindsay, drop in to Vancouver and spend some time with your Uncle Alf, our Cousin Bunny Humphreys (my father’s older brother’s daughter) and your Dadio. We’ll tell you stories that will have you crying one minute and rolling on the floor the next. All the while you can enjoy our company, take mental notes and digital pictures and put it on your blog so that your children and their children will know more about your heritage. Hell, we’ll even pour you a drink or more of your choice!
When you’re done with us, drop in and see your two surviving grandparents while they are still here. Get to know them better while you gather stories and picutes you can put on your blog.
Remember this. Nothing will ever replace working together with a family member one on one towards the common goal of building trust and love and having the byproduct of many, many memories you (and they?) can blog about.
The moral of this comment is this. Blogs are great. And with todays’ generation an apparant necessity with the hopes of enabling our children to get too know us, their parents, and we them, our children. If you want to know what your grandparents were or are all about, you had better start talking to them and or visiting them soon as, as you already know, they may not be around much longer. They don’t blog. In which case you will only have your parents and their pictures and memories of years gone by with stories told and remembered. So…if you don’t see those pictures and stories on a blog soon you had best start spending a little less time in front of the tv and computers and more quality time with your folks listening to their stories and looking through their old photo albums. If you can’t spend the time now in front of them and SKYPE is a better or only option, then take that time to ask the questions and find out who your grandparents and your parents really are, now. It may take a while before they get their blog together.
Love you!! MEAN IT!!!
XOXOXO
Miss you lots!!!